I'm irritated. I find myself snapping at people more easily, rolling my eyes more often, and dramatically sighing frequently. I always seem to be on my guard, perpetually tired. I lack motivation. I miss my mom and dad. I miss my big bed. I miss how simple life seemed when I was 10. How do I explain it?
How do you end a week on a high only to crash and burn at the start of the next week? I just feel like nothing's ever going to happen. It's like I'm just spinning my wheels going nowhere. I need to make a change. I need to let light into my life, there are too many dark areas.
How do you choose to be happy? Is there a special way of looking at things that keeps the bad away? I go through phases. Sometimes I feel really happy. I feel like everything in my life is as it should be.
I'm going to school and learning a lot. I'm hanging out with friends and laughing. I'm magnifying my church calling, working hard for the Lord.
But then sometimes I feel like it's not enough. Not enough in the sense that there has to be more in my life, not that I'm not working hard enough.
I'm going to use this long weekend coming up to organize my life, and overall my attitude. Because there is no way I can make it through the rest of the semester feeling like this, I won't survive.
UPDATE: It's amazing what skipping a couple of classes will do for your disposition. I highly recommend it!
1 comment:
Sounds like being pregnant. Ha ha. I'm sorry you're having a hard time. You're right though.. skipping classes can be quite liberating (don't do it to much though, or you'll end up feeling crappy again. i know from experience). Take care, and I hope you feel better soon! P.S. is it weird that I stalk your blog? ha ha. Love ya!
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